"Ready... Self?"
It was 13 years after Lolly's had opened, accompanied by their famous music video: Lolly Lolly Lolly get your Adverbs Here.
Lolly, Jr. was in a state of depression. His father was ill, and his own son was in the military, leaving him to run the business alone. Business was going down quickly, quickly, quickly.
"Would you like an adverb?"
"No thank you, I have conjunction junction. They give me all the conjunctions I'll ever need."
"Would you like an adverb, sir?"
"No, I have nouns."
Lolly, Jr. shook his head, hearing the phone ring.
"Hello?"
"Hello, this is Fred Fredrickson, you know, guy who promoted your store. I'm afraid I have some bad news. We're going to have to shut down Lolly's because of our financial cuttings. I need to sell the building and everything in it... I'm sorry, Lolly."
Lolly, Jr. hung up the phone angrily, walking into his secret back room. An RPG-7 was waiting; It only had one rocket.
Lolly knew what to do, picking up the rocket launcher, he closed his store early, locking it tight, going to make his way to Conjunction Junction. Those jerkoffs, he thought.
Lolly got to Conjunction Junction.
"Hello sir, would you like a Conjunction?"
"No, I'm here to promote my store! I MEAN, IT WAS MY STORE!"
Lolly blasted away all of the conjunctions, sacrificing himself.